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“We need to talk,” may be the most terrifying four words in the English language—especially when it’s prefacing a conversation with your parents about their finances.

The aging parent money talk: exactly what to say (and when)

[Photos: SDI Productions/Getty Images; Luke Chesser/Unsplash; Annie Spratt/Unsplash; StellrWeb/Unsplash]

BY Emily Guy Birken4 minute read

Asking your parents about their finances can feel nearly as invasive as asking about their sex lives. It’s private, none of your business, and not something we discuss in this family!

But as your parents age, money won’t necessarily stay private and it can very much become your business, whether Mom and Dad want it to or not. As of 2021, the average annual cost of a private room in a nursing home was over $108,000 , and paying out-of-pocket is the primary way families pay for nursing home care.

No matter how uncomfortable the conversations may be, it’s vital for adult children to talk to their parents about money. This will help the whole family prepare for any major financial issues that crop up as their parents transition into retirement and beyond.

If the very idea of asking your folks about their finances makes you break into a cold sweat, here are some ways to broach the subject.

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Emily Guy Birken is a Milwaukee-based personal finance writer. Her books include The 5 Years Before You Retire, Choose Your Retirement, Making Social Security Work for You, and End Financial Stress Now. More


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