Samuel L. Jackson has a message for everyone: Stay home. With so many people still not taking the concept of social distancing seriously, it’s probably best to hear this message as much as possible.
Jackson appeared on Jimmy Kimmel Live!—like the host, from the comfort of his own home—and talked about canceled plans to vacation in Italy and binge-watching Tiger King with his daughter. More important, to read Stay the F**k at Home. Yes, it’s a revamping of Go the F**k to Sleep, the bedtime poem that Jackson read to the world nearly 10 years ago. This time around, Jackson is imploring people to be smart and keep their distance, but of course, his messaging is laced with lots of f-bombs and mf-bombs.
“I’m not a doctor, but motherf**kers listen when I read a poem. So here I am, Sam f**king Jackson, imploring you, keep your ass at home!”
Meanwhile, Larry David teamed with the Office of the Governor of California to deliver a message in pure, 100% Larry David Curb Your Enthusiasm fashion and implore the “idiots out there” who are “socializing too close” to stay at home and save a life.
“If you’ve seen my show, nothing good ever happens going outside of the house, you know that. There’s just trouble out there. It’s not a good place to be, so stay home and don’t see anyone, except if there’s a plumbing emergency, let the plumber in and wipe everything down after he leaves, but that’s it.”
“You’re hurting old people like me. Well, not me… I’ll never see you.”
— Office of the Governor of California (@CAgovernor) March 31, 2020
What a time to be antisocial on purpose!