Work/Life: How Many Grams of Fat Are In That Attitude?

Here’s one that slipped under the radar while the Republicans were bashing Hillary and Hillary was bashing Obama and Obama was bashing Hillary and Amy Winehouse was bashing herself.


Starting March 31, New York City fast-food chains (“chain” defined as an establishment that maintains fifteen or more outlets) will be required to post the fat content of their food on their menu boards. If I were Mickey D’s, I would be vanilla shaking in my boots.

But it does bring to mind that lots of things should carry posted information about how many grams of certain qualities they contain. Here a few tags I would enjoy seeing out there in the world:

Toxicity 1500 mg
Uncooperativeness 750mg
Incompetence 300g

Disaffectedness 2500mg
Unhelpfulness 130g
Sense of Entitlement 400mg

Authoritative 4300g
Paranoia-Inducing 120g
Billable Hours 45000873200008654g

Thought Enough of You to Marry You 400mg
Calls You On Your Crap 1500mg
Thinks You Should Know What’s Wrong Without Having to Ask 300mg
Unconditional Love In Spite of How You Are 5200g

Obstinacy 3000mg
Whining 375g
Manic Energy 1200mg
Worth It 5200g

Oh, and there is one more thing happening this weekend that should carry its own warning label: the new Rambo movie. Anyway, feel free to contribute other informational labels that should accompany real life.