Ceo Dad’s Tuesday Tirade….
Take comfort, work-obsessed individuals. America is actually ahead of Asia in work/life awareness. According to a new report, only one half of one percent of men in Japan take time off to be with their families.
This has not gone unnoticed by the Japanese non-profit organization “Fathering Japan,” who are currently urging their country’s male workforce to take the “Daddy Exam.” It’s a test filled with questions designed to highlight the men’s lack of knowledge in parenting, and serve as a wake-up call. The good news is that Japanese statistics show many younger men are starting to work less and spend time with their families, and men’s parenting magazines are enjoying brisk sales.
But, let’s not gloat. Only 14 percent of American men are cutting down on work to spend time with their families. That leaves 86 percent who aren’t. Thinking on my feet, I have started the paperwork on my own non-profit organization. (Please don’t tell my father—I was raised in a decidedly for-profit home, and if he found out about this he might need medication.) (Oh, and don’t worry, he won’t find out about it here, he never reads my blog.) (A point not lost on my therapist.) Where was I?
Oh, yes, my non-profit. It’s called “Dumbbell Daddies (501c3).” And I’ve developed my own “Daddy Exam,” just like the folks in Japan. See how you do.
1.Your wife is giving birth to your first child at the same time as a make-or-break deal with a powerful client who’s only in town for the night is pending. Baby or Big Shot?
2.It’s time for your child to be toilet trained. Do you: a) read the literature and learn how to work in tandem with your spouse to handle this transition smoothy, b) run screaming from the room, c) run screaming from the car if that’s where you first got the news, or c) stand in one place and scream.
3.Every time your child asks for permission to do something, you respond “ask your mother.” Is this effective parenting? (Hint: don’t answer “yes.”)
4.It’s getting difficult to deal with the acting out, the testing of limits and the inability to accept it when things don’t go as planned. Should your wife cope with you being an idiot first, or start with the other two-year old in the family?
5.Once again, you are late picking up your child at soccer practice. Is there some way for you to blame this on anyone else? (Hint: see hint #3, above).
Answers: 1. Baby, 2. a, 3. No. , 4. She should tell you off first. 5. No
HOW DID YOU DO?
5 correct – Whoa, Daddy!
3 to 4 correct – Still welcome at the PTA
2 or less correct – Can you say couples counseling?
Thank you for taking this simple quiz. Watch this space for easy ways to make donations to my non-profit. (Just kidding, Dad!) (Oh, wait, I forgot, you don’t read these things anyway.)