On Friday morning, Stormy Daniels came for Roseanne Barr with an NSFW fierceness that sent mouths agape across the Twittersphere.
I don't even do anal movies, you ignorant twat. That's like saying you are known for your beautiful rendition of The Star Spangled Banner. https://t.co/azOOZMDGdw
— Stormy Daniels (@StormyDaniels) May 4, 2018
Vulgar though the retort may be, it offers a glimpse into what has kept Stormy’s story in the spotlight for all of 2018, despite the daily churn of disaster that is the trademark of the Trump era. Stormy Daniels is–there’s really no other way to say it–habitually un-fuckwithable. She can’t be intimidated. She can’t be made a fool of. She can’t be stopped.
The woman born Stephanie Clifford made waves in March with a 60 Minutes interview that left the leader of the free world looking like an inept, horny schoolboy who was born rich and deprived of nothing. However embarrassing an extramarital affair with an adult film star might have seemed had it come out in October 2016, the graphic description of said affair that’s come to light in the turmoil over Daniels’s hush money payment is exponentially worse. No matter how the story ends up shaking out, if there’s a winner between Trump and Daniels, it is unquestionably Daniels.
As many people tuned in to see her decimate Trump’s self-mythology on 60 Minutes, millions more are watching Daniels perform similar savagery on a daily basis on Twitter. Roseanne Barr isn’t the first trolling presence who has found her- or himself (usually “him-“) in Daniels’s merciless crosshairs. Looking back through quote-tweets and replies reveals her penchant for putting chumps in their place. More than just epic clapbacks, these Twitter dismissals are also instructive.
Daniels’s tweets reveal the following philosophies, which could be handy for anyone who has to deal with assholes. In other words, all of us.
Never let anyone take control of your narrative with their interpretation.
You are implying that women with certain jobs cannot be assaulted. This is a disgusting and terrifying thought process. For the record, I have stated numerous times that I am not claiming a "#metoo card" but I see you are definitely flying your asshat flag. https://t.co/erRFeNsMul
— Stormy Daniels (@StormyDaniels) April 1, 2018
I'm offenSIVE not offended so definitely not a "snowflake". Haha! https://t.co/68ZwyZwqTI
— Stormy Daniels (@StormyDaniels) April 28, 2018
Technically I didn't sleep with the POTUS 12 years ago. There was no sleeping (hehe) and he was just a goofy reality TV star. But I digress…People DO care that he lied about it, had me bullied, broke laws to cover it up, etc. And PS…I am NOT going anywhere. xoxoxo https://t.co/Js9sEnanIk
— Stormy Daniels (@StormyDaniels) March 20, 2018
Never feel like your job description entails being likable.
Do you seriously think I give a flying fuck if people "like" me? I'd have become a kindergarten teacher if that was my goal in life. And for someone who doesn't want to "see" me, you took the time to come to my twitter and type a message to me? OK https://t.co/McrN8E8aCC
— Stormy Daniels (@StormyDaniels) March 20, 2018
Always have a sense of humor about yourself.
Haha! What does that say about you since they got YOUR attention? Of course, my tits are fake (I've never claimed otherwise). Riding into my 60 Minutes interview on a fucking unicorn would be more believable than my boobs being all natural. https://t.co/QuFWLsOO9N
— Stormy Daniels (@StormyDaniels) March 25, 2018
Have you seen my tits? (Of course, you have) I don't jog anywhere. So I'll just sit here, sipping my coffee and talking shit. Xoxo https://t.co/fnsJ5SVcO2
— Stormy Daniels (@StormyDaniels) May 3, 2018
Be proud of your accomplishments.
I'm a porn DIRECTOR too (one of the youngest actually) so sorry to burst your bubble but I won't be "moving on" and I definitely have no intention of being "modest". Ever. https://t.co/hqrutgNMwp
— Stormy Daniels (@StormyDaniels) April 6, 2018
Would you like the list in alphabetical or chronological order? And I guarantee you that I do not "need money" but feel free to tip generously while you stalk my site. Xoxo https://t.co/m6h8p52opE
— Stormy Daniels (@StormyDaniels) April 1, 2018
Never apologize for who you are.
This is fucking awesome! Thanks for sharing! And I'm not "hosting parties"…I am getting NAKED AND DIRTY onstage for my fans, just like I always have. Shall I save you a seat in the splash zone?? xoxoxoxo
— Stormy Daniels (@StormyDaniels) April 23, 2018
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