Mathematically, the odds of Earth being the only planet in the entire solar system that could sustain living creatures is negligible. Something else is out there, waiting for us. It’s just a matter of time. Until then, we point tremendously powerful telescopes at the sky and send explorers out into the celestial depths, looking for answers and preparing for contact. Though one can only theorize at this point what an extraterrestrial life form might eventually communicate, astronomers, philosophers, and science fiction authors have long held fascinating theories. Add to that list a new theory, from a suburban gym in England: Aliens are coming for fat people.
The Fit4Less gym, situated in Long Eaton, Notts recently introduced a billboard urging people to work out because aliens will “take the fat ones first!” Included are images of a flying saucer hovering over a slightly bell-shaped body, and a sinewy alien front and center, looking directly at the viewer as though picking from a menu. People are understandably not in love with this billboard. It’s bad enough that difficult beauty standards are reinforced in seemingly every magazine, movie, and TV show on Earth—now we’re being fat-shamed from outer space.
It’s unclear whether the ad is suggesting that aliens have a thing for overweight people and are targeting them specifically to soak up all those sweet nutrients, or whether the ad is instead saying that slim folks can run faster and avoid the little green men. What is clear is that offering sanctuary from an alien invasion is a misguided incentive at best, and that the gym’s CEO who refuses to take the billboard down could possibly use a good probing.