Literally all out of opinions. Done with ’em. No opinions left. Just vague feelings and a variety of shrugs.
— Holly Gramazio (@hollygramazio) June 7, 2015
Memoir,” in publishing, is a euphemism for “fiction that will sell,” so it comes as no surprise to learn that Primates of Park Avenue is full of lies. Author “Wednesday” (Wendy) “Martin told The Post she ‘telescoped certain parts of the narrative…’,” which is a strange way to use a word that means “looked at real things that are far away.” If you need a word that means “made up fake things that are right up close,” can I suggest “imagineered?” Publisher Simon & Schuster has said that “A clarifying note will be added to the e-book and to subsequent print editions,” which will presumably read: “Lol, j/k!!! ^_^” Also accused of sociological imagineering is Alice Goffman, who, as white people do when we want to signal seriousness, hung out with some black people and then wrote a book about them. But “On the Run: Fugitive Life in an American City” is the subject of increasing doubt and already has attracted at least one long anonymous pastebin critique. As the saying goes, “Pastebin at morning, Blappo take warning!”
i’m not a cautious reporter, so i can say it: “on the run” author alice goffman probably made her entire book up http://t.co/XVpUabLkci
— Seppo Blatto (@blippoblappo) June 6, 2015
Also in fiction: no, the Hamptons Police do not have a surplus military submarine. David Brooks asserts that “according to a range of academic studies, about 23 percent of the electorate can be swayed by a compelling campaign,” but neglects to mention that 88 percent of statistics are made up. A short story about Silicon Valley is being marketed with incredible effectiveness, and is probably an ad for something. And finally, Paul Ford, who we can always count on to correctly label his fiction and also use it to tell the truth better than most journalism, wrote a story for Motherboard about getting old in Silicon Valley.
Forget the Times’s Wilderness-Collective-in-a-treehouse “Bro-topia” or this summer camp for “grownups”, let’s all go live in a haunted mansion! Defending a hedge fund billionaire is the hottest take of all. I’d like to correct one point in this long Slate tab about Clickhole: “lol nothing matters,” is a security blanket for NY media babies. Tabs believes that everything matters. Another clickbait publisher tries to appeal to snake people. I bet the catcher signals one if by land, two if by sea. We’re gonna need a bigger boat. Corporate autopsy dot io. Write with your tabs. And Elon Green found the Orson Welles lesbian shower scene!
Medium lost no time in its pivot to “engagement” and income, launching a series called Work: Reimagined about how great it is not to have a job, which is coincidentally sponsored by a freelancing platform. The series is “presented by” the sponsor, but the content is pretty clearly pro-freelancing, which leaves it vague whether this is advertising or what, and opens up the question more generally: is this sponsored content? Is this? What about this whole On-Demand series?
Let me be clear: Intern Romy and I are both completely in the tank for this month’s intern sponsors, Slack and Qapital. When we sell our independence and credibility, I will make damn sure you know it.
I read that NYT Jenner tab and just kind of flinched, so thanks for tackling that one, Romy!
Today’s Dystopian Blooper Reel: Sure, the robots are funny… FOR NOW.
~Sometimes in our lives we all have tabs, we all have sorrow~