Sadly three months too late for Valentine’s Day, one woman has just recorded the world’s most perfect love song. Wait a second, that’s not true. She recorded the opposite of that, the world’s least perfect love song, and an important reminder that men are, in fact, disgusting.
YouTuber Sarah Carter has apparently not found any sustained romantic bliss in her voyage through the Tinder-verse. As detailed in “The Tinder Song,” which she recorded based entirely from messages received through the dating app, swiping right has most often lead down a dark, shadowy road. “Cute little smirk, can you twerk on my penis?” is apparently one of the more safe-for-work dispatches Carter incurred. The dick-solicitors get even more uncouth as the song, which she sings while plucking a ukelele, goes on. You won’t be hearing this on the radio any time soon, but hopefully you won’t be hearing these kinds of come-ons at all for much longer, until all men are finally excommunicated from Earth and forced to live in a giant space-colony.
[via Happy Place]