Today in Tabs: What Happened?

The week that would not end.

Today in Tabs: What Happened?

What happened was:


[via] Brian Merchant at Motherboard we now know what happened to Carles. This whole story is ‘brutally real’ and ‘authentic’ (not ‘alt-authentic’), and internet fame should be a controlled substance somehow. Meanwhile MTV is rebranding and this is the design brief: “We want something that feels in development, experimental, and made by a person, an artist, not a company.” The new auth-wave aesthetic is being coöpted before it even exists [via nobody giving a shit].

am i ‘auth’ yet bb [via com]

The New New Republic came out hard, with its first cover story an extremely self-critical look at TNR’s history of racism by Jeet Heer.

[E]moji, or emoticon, as the symbol is sometimes called…” wrote the New York Times of Old People Who Literally Can’t Even Use Wikipedia, and proto-Madrigal and Noted Internet Young Robinson Meyer clarified the difference but also went bananas and ranted about soup?

Natasha Lennard got Fused, and will no doubt find the authentic “site of cultural production” she is seeking at the Miami-based Univision/Disney partnership. Who else has been Fused so far?

AT&T(?) is making a scripted series (??) about superheroes (???) for Snapchat (?????infinity?). This dot cm is reportedly #trending among people who use hashtags earnestly. But are people really clamoring?

EJ Dickson wrote a hell of a story about the time she took a dick pill (no relation) in the Las Vegas airport and wound up in the hospital. It’s Friday, come on, go read this stellar personal anecdote. The future of news will be just as screwed up when you get back to worrying about it on Monday.


Let’s take a Kanye Break.

Chait followed up his white whine with some top notch sea-lioning. “Why are my critics unwilling to have a reasoned discussion!” Chait barks, his long whiskers scratching the back of your neck and his breath reeking of stale herring. “I am not upset in the slightest degree!

In the Chait-takes, David Frum wrote about it. There are charts. That’s all I really saw before I scooped out my own eyeballs like it was the Event Horizon so as not to have to even try to read it. But Freddie de Boer doesn’t know what to do, you guys. Freddie has seen some shit. “I have seen, with my own two eyes, a 33 year old Hispanic man, an Iraq war veteran… be lectured about patriarchy by an affluent 22 year old white liberal arts college student…” Freddie’s done six “tours” in grad school, you guys. You don’t know what it’s like. Freddie has seen some shit.

Oh well, at least the blog is dead.

Mitt Quit. Awl aboard the SADness train. Modern Farmer dot pdf. Clippy y’all. saved by the bell hooks. George Zimmerman’s Get Out Of Jail free card still valid.

Today’s Toy: Poetweet


Today’s Song: Alvvays, “Archie, Marry Me

~Tell Nori about Tabs~

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