Everyone wants to be a superhero, but let’s face it. Some people just aren’t cut out for the job, for any number of reasons. They don’t look good in spandex, they drive a Nissan Versa, they’re allergic to bee stings and perfume, etc.
But let’s say you’re struck by a bolt of mystical lightning, or trapped in an irradiated fog mist, and wham!–all of a sudden you have superpowers. Is this an opportunity you should be taking seriously?
Designed by Charley Chartwell, a Seattle-based husband-and-wife design team comprised of Aurelia and Timothy Sanders, the “Would I Make A Good Superhero?” chart is a humorous look at the qualities that make some superheroes great, and other superheroes Aquaman. Looking like a poster that could very well come from the back pages of a Chris Ware Acme Novelty Library comic, the chart lists and diagrams the things a superhero needs to worry about into four easy-to-read categories: a superhero’s epic powers, household considerations, secret identity, and daily schedule.
Obviously, a superhero is only as good as his secret identity, so your ability to pull off a nebbish alter-ego is a must. Same with your rogue’s gallery: after all, a hero is only as good as the weirdos who hate him. But the other considerations a hero must worry about are less obvious. For example, what’s your car like? If a superhero is going to drive, it’s got to be something cool: something more like the Batmobile, than, say, the Spider-Buggy, and definitely not the 1988 Chevy Nova your great-grand-aunt Denise sold you for $1 when she entered the retirement home last year.
If you’d like to buy a print of the “Will I Make A Good Superhero?” chart, you can pick it up for $20 here. You never know when you’re going to be bitten by an irradiated dolphin.