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Today in Tabs: Southern Bulle

Honestly? I don’t think we’re out of the woods yet.

Today in Tabs: Southern Bulle
[Photo: Flickr user Insomnia Cured Here]

Saints preserve.us from Blake Lively, Contessa of Cwestionable Copy and Superintendent of Solecism. Preserve‘s Fall issue is called Allure of Antebellum, referring specifically to “the Antebellum period (prior to the Civil War)” in case you didn’t know what “antebellum” meant. “The prowess of artful layering –the southern way– lies in inadvertent combinations,” says Lively’s characteristically arbitrary introductory copy. Gawker‘s Allie Jones noted that the “Southern Belles” of Lively’s inspiration were in fact slave owners, and also called back to Lively’s slave plantation wedding last year. Max Read posted a takedown letter from Lively’s lawyers, who assert that Gawker “paints Ms. Lively and Preserve in a false light,” which is not, presumably, the honest and authentic kerosene-fired lamplight of the slave cabins of yesteryear. Stay tuned, and ~shop the controversy~

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Meanwhile Cornel West was knocked down and arrested yesterday at a protest in Ferguson along with approximately 50 other people who haven’t murdered any unarmed black teenagers.

Basic” is over, declares Noreen Malone, another beautiful thing ruined by misogyny and VICE. Someone replaced “SJW” with “skeleton” in this gamergate Reddit thread and accidentally created the future of horror fiction. Read Patricia Matthew on Roxane Gay and “THE BLACK ♀” in The New Inquiry (and also enjoy that url slug). “…sometimes, the best thing to do is apologize.” Did you know Alexis Coe has a book out? About a teenage lesbian murder in 1892? if you’re in or near San Francisco you can watch Mallory Ortberg talk to her about the book next Wednesday night! But don’t tell me if you do because I am already dead of envy and there’s no use telling a dead man about book chat.

Kat Stoeffel:feminism is a practice, not a status.” Read this it’s great.

Fashion trash factory Louis Vuitton craps out a Karl Lagerfeld-designed punching bag. Martin Amis writes Hitler / Braun fanfic. Elon Green drops another in his occasional series of inconclusive explorations of literary myth: the naked Esquire photo shoot that supposedly featured Truman Capote, Leonard Bernstein, Margaret Mead, and Marshall McLuhan, among others. Martha Stewart throws some shade at Gwyneth. 2day in Dadz (via Les Horn).

“How to travel out of Liberia” –NY Times. “Ebola crisis: DOGS AND CATS NOT AT RISK” –TMZ EXCLUSIVE.

There’s a new video of the Greenwich Village Ninja Turtle. Big Data: 11,000 sets of tags applied to state legislation. Anaconda, as spoken word (via DailyDot). The Dropbox password leak is nothing to worry about but please enable two-factor auth right now if you haven’t. Please? Just do it. With tilde.club already full of #sponcon, totallynuclear.club is the new hotness. Here is what you will find there.

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Bijan what’s up in Ivy-grad Millennial land?

TODAY’S INTERN TAB, by BIJAN STEPHEN
Last night I met a friend at a bar before a reading headlined by some emo white dude. We were talking about our Southern upbringings—small towns suck, y’all, try not to romanticize them—when she told me that she’d lived in New York for 10 years now, but still wasn’t comfortable calling it home.

Another friend showed up later. He said he’d been in the same Brooklyn apartment for the last 15 years, and was afraid that he’d become “one of those people”—which I took to mean someone who’d been around long enough to see their neighborhood drastically change, long enough for it to feel familial.

Anyway, people live in Brooklyn. This is a fact, I’ve learned, that’s more true for some segments of the New York population than others. Emo white dudes at readings, for example. It’s a very good brand, the The Atlantic noted. But a brand isn’t a home. At least, not yet.

People live in Brooklyn” is probably most true for the segment of the New York population that, you know, lives in Brooklyn.

Today’s Art: Sincerity Machine

Today’s Song: Taylor Swift’s second single from the upcoming 1989, “Out of the Woods

~But the monsters turned out to be just tabs~

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Today in Tabs would like to remind you that we are not out of the woods. Read us on FastCoLabs or in email for the decreasing percentage of you that ever see the emails arrive (we’re working on it). Follow @rustyk5 and/or @TodayinTabs on Twitter if you like Tabs but wish it were a lot shorter.