The Hysteria Over Death By Sitting Reaches Its Logical Conclusion

The Hysteria Over Death By Sitting Reaches Its Logical Conclusion
[Image: Flickr user Luca Serazzi]

Productivity seekers intimidated by treadmill desks can now thank the Kickstarter gods for Cubii, an elliptical desk companion. Much like the fitness machine found at your local gym, Cubii is a low-impact way to feel like you’re doing exercise. And, unlike treadmill desks, which can cost upwards of $1,000 and barely fit in a cubicle, Cubii slides right under your desk and retails for $350.

It’s a pretty simple concept: To deter the effects of Sedentary Death Syndrome, just pedal. It comes with an app to track progress. (Of course it does.)

The Cubii

Cubii has received more than $80,000 in funding, exceeding its Kickstarter goal.

Let us count the ways this is absurd.

This Already Exists For A Fraction Of The Price

“Conventional pedal exercise machines have not been designed for under-desk use, resulting in numerous distractions,” reads the Cubii Kickstarter, which isn’t exactly true. Sure, the DeskCycler doesn’t come with an app, like Cubii, but a markup of $150 seems steep for some incredibly simple software.

This Can’t Possibly Burn That Many Calories

Treadmill desks, which involve standing and considerably more effort, burn on average 100 calories an hour. The DeskCycler yielded around 67 calories per hour for one tester at Huffington Post. We have to assume the elliptical falls somewhere below even that. You are, after all, still sitting on your duff.

The Scare Tactics Are Out Of Control

Here’s a low-budget way to avoid death by sitting: Get up and walk around once every hour. It costs zero dollars.RG