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An Alarm Clock Sex Toy To Gently Buzz Your Genitals Awake In The Morning

Get ready for your snorgasm.

Do you have a hate-hate relationship with your alarm clock? Are you fussing and fretting over what to get your loved ones for the holidays? Fear not, for the Little Rooster is here to give you the best waking up experience you’ve had.

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“How is it that, until 2011, the alarm clock vibrator was not a thing?” Little Rooster inventor Tony Maggs wrote Co.Exist in an email. “Mad.”

According to Maggs, Little Rooster features 30 pressure settings for “precision pleasure,” and even though it sort of resembles a plastic spatula for your vagina, he claims it’s quite comfortable. The little handle bit in the middle fits between your legs, and as Maggs demonstrates in this ridiculous “Kit Kat test” video, allows the user to cross legs and roll around. We’re still not sure what the Kit Kat has to do with it, but that’s sort of beside the point.

If you’re interested in alternative sex toys, perhaps you’d like the Elaico system, which lets you engage in more, um, pleasurable Skype chats.

Before Maggs came up with the Little Rooster, he didn’t have a background in design–he did, however, co-host “Stay Beautiful,” a Bowie-esque Brighton glam club night. Maggs had always thought a vibrating alarm clock had existed somewhere out there, but when he discovered it didn’t, he set about working with industrial designers to come up with his own.

Maggs is also something of an evangelist for the power of the morning orgasm. When a group of conservative consultants reportedly gifted Rep. Michele Bachmann with a sex toy that they thought was a massager (to help relieve the congresswoman’s migraines), Maggs wrote Bachmann an open letter, suggesting she try a vibrating alarm (or “stimulus package”) instead. She never got back to him about that, but Maggs insists orgasms do help with migraines. “And if owning a Little Rooster helped her empathize a little more with other people’s sexualities, I think there would be a whole lot fewer headaches all round,” he added.

The inventor is also developing a Little Rooster for men, or something like it. Last year, he showcased a prototype on YouTube (I didn’t ask where that string goes), but now Maggs says he’ll be debuting a new product in a few weeks.

A snorgasm, mind you, is another term for what it’s like to wake up with the Little Rooster. “The result is a sensual awakening, where you feel the pleasure before you are entirely aware of where you are, of what is happening,” Maggs wrote.

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That does sound kind of nice. Maggs also sees Little Rooster as an embrace of sex positivity in the modern age. “A lot of people have expressed the view that the fact that people are waking up to Little Rooster in 2013 says something about society today,” he wrote. “I think that the fact that an alarm clock vibrator that you wear in your underwear didn’t exist until two years ago is a much more damning indictment of our society.”

Not going to argue with that.

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About the author

Sydney Brownstone is a Seattle-based former staff writer at Co.Exist. She lives in a Brooklyn apartment with windows that don’t quite open, and covers environment, health, and data

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