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Harvard or Yale? The high-school overachievers’ nagging existential dilemma suddenly got a whole lot easier thanks to the taste-prediction startup Hunch. Hunch enlisted Column Five Media to design an infographic that ranks the eight Ivies—Harvard, Yale, Princeton, Penn, Brown, Columbia, Cornell, and Dartmouth—on a host of personal preferences, from political ideology to predilection for whipping out a fake ID. Then they plotted the rankings on the adorably collegiate scales you see below: [figure=inline-large][caption][/caption][/figure] [caption][Click image for larger view] [/caption] Prospective students can glance through to see where their star fits into the Ivy galaxy. Though we urge you not to take the rankings too seriously. To judge by the infographic, Harvard is a hothouse of right-wing, global-warming denialists who ride Harleys, don't date outside of their race, and insist on making their beds every day. Surely, they were thinking of Dartmouth . . . Oh, just kidding. In all seriousness, though, the data doesn’t paint a terribly accurate portrait of the nation’s most elite universities, and here’s why: They’re based on predictions Hunch made, using algorithms, of fans of the respective schools, not students, professors, and staff. So it tells you more about people who want to go to Harvard than about the people who actually get in and attend. Phew. And there we were thinking old Crimson matriculated sociopaths. [Top image via]