The Professional Generation Gap

Start and finish with values: Whatever values your kids hold (and you may not share them) aligning personal values with values articulated at work is, in my opinion, the single most important aspect of a satisfying career. If your children want to change the world, don’t let them join a conservative institution. If they love order and routine, steer them away from start ups. If they’re independent free thinkers, don’t send them into a law office. If they need to feel they’re making the world a better place, don’t put them in retail. It isn’t about good and bad industries; it is about fit.

Make a plan: When your children have a sense of what they want to do, encourage them to make a plan. Who do they know who can help? Where are the key information sources? Do they have the skills they need and, if not, how will they acquire them? Marjorie Scardino, the CEO of Pearson, says you should have a plan and "execute it violently." She points out that we plan most major aspects of our lives -- weddings, vacations, house moves. Why not plan a career? Opportunism is great but unreliable. Plans have a weird habit of illuminating opportunities -- but when those don’t come along, you still have momentum.

The reason Kim and her parents are at such loggerheads is because they started talking about jobs and industries first. But jobs and industries change. What matters to anyone at any stage of their career is understanding who he is and what he wants. That will keep changing. But if your children know how to explore those existential questions, you will have given them the career tool that will never date.