There may be no purer expression of the consumer impulse than the vending machine--the idea being that there's something you need or want so bad that it sells itself, with no need for any salesmanship at all. But around the world, what people want or need varies wildly. That's the conceit of Vending Machines: Coined Consumerism, a new book by Christopher D. Salyers. The book is filled with vending machines that tell interesting stories, found through years of scouring weird malls and spooky parking lots. Here's a few of the gems he found.

The tamest examples, obviously, come from the U.S. Here, a vending machine at the rooftop pool of the Standard Hotel in Los Angeles, where you can buy a pair of board shorts if you've forgotten your swimsuit--thereby encouraging a little frisson of hedonism, conveniently pre-packaged.

For the weird stuff, you've gotta turn to Japan. Why have a Coke vending machine, when you could instead have a ROBOT COKE VENDING MACHINE that walks and talks? As Salyer quips, "Straight out of an absurd William Gibson novel."

In Japan, vending machines are often a necessity, offering 24-hour access to refrigerated goods, when most people have little storage room in their houses. But other vending machines reflect cultural mores. In this fetish store, you pick out what you want and put your money into a machine. Then an unseen attendant fetches your selection. The filter of a vending machine is used here to offer another layer of kinky privacy--though it's slightly superfluous, given that you never see the attendant. (Hourly hotels and sex shops similarly have screens that only let you see the attendants hands.)

A fortune -telling vending machine in Tokyo. The dragon jerks around after you put your money in, eventually spitting our your fortune. Salyer's read, "Your fortune--Pretty good. Be modest and faithful. You'd better not try to do anything with your own will." Indeed.

A sign of the times: A "Gold to Go" vending machine, which debuted in the Frankfurt airport in 2009. The machine basically profits from fears of a bank collapse: For about $40, you get about 1g of gold, which is about 30% higher than market rate. (We previously covered the machines here.)

Italy wins for the grossest food-stuff offered in the vending machine. Labeled "Let's Pizza," it supposedly assembles a pie from fresh ingredients--kneading dough from flour and water on the spot. A pizza emerges about three minutes after you put the money in.

Wait, I can't tell from the blurry pic what's in this vending machine...

...Oh. It's pet roaches.

The most infamous vending machine of all might be the used-panty vending machines of Japan. Though thought to be only an urban myth, Salyer actually found some. The trend originally began in 1993, but was quickly deemed illegal. That resulted in underground vending machines that would periodically crop up, only to be quickly removed. Today, in accordance with the law, most of these sell fake used panties, scented with things like mango. Um. Yeah.