The Fall and Rise of David Pottruck

Many executives, particularly those of Pottruck's age and tax bracket, would simply have retired, using that competitive fire to improve their handicaps. But for Pottruck, the best coping strategy was simply to charge ahead, to believe that what came next was just as important as what had come before. By September, he had settled into luxurious new offices (paid for by Schwab as part of his severance agreement) that overlooked San Francisco's Embarcadero, just 10 blocks from Schwab's offices. "There is going to be mourning," says Howard Morgan, a leadership consultant who has worked with Pottruck and other fired executives, "but successful people let go of the past as quickly as they can. You can't mourn at the same time you have a new beginning because it drags the new beginning down."

He named his company the Pottruck Group, (now called Red Eagle Ventures), although he wasn't quite sure what it would do. "We had an agreement that we would have a nice fall and have long lunches and see friends and regroup," says Bagan-McGill. Instead, Pottruck threw himself into meetings with private-equity folks and headhunters in search of the next new thing.

But what was this thing? At first, it seemed to be the same old thing. Pottruck thought he needed to be CEO again, maybe even in financial services. "For the first six months, I was in a sort of post-Schwab stress syndrome," he says. "The first tendency is to re-create your old life, because that's what you know." He missed, in his words, the "stress and the adrenaline that comes when I look myself in the mirror and say, 'I hope I'm good enough in my heart of hearts to do what every day requires.' "

But as the weeks went by, Pottruck began to confront the reality that there were many things about his job that he hadn't liked at all. He had been the guy who skied past the mountains of Vail while talking through the cell phone attached to his helmet. He had little time for his children or his spouse. And despite his high rank at Schwab, he was also something of a micromanager. "The adrenaline rush you have every day, the excitement and joy that is part of that job, I know what that feels like," he says. "That's the comfortable place. But it's sort of like when I look back on my days as a college football player. When I really search my soul, I remember puking in the summer two-a-day practices we had, and my various surgeries, and it all wasn't so great."

He relived the mind-numbing administrative meetings, the power struggles, the strategic decisions that went awry, and of course, the layoffs. "It was horrible," he says. As he had more time to reflect, he realized that he'd been happiest at Schwab when the company was smaller and more able to take risks. Perhaps that was the right fit now.

Pottruck began to look at opportunities in smaller businesses in everything from for-profit education to sports to transportation. He wondered if there might be a role for him if his friend John McCain decided to run for president. He realized that he just might be able to enjoy himself as an active investor or the chairman of a company without being CEO. It was a big step.

Stage IV: Resolution of the Loss

The concept of the loss is idealized. Preoccupation with the loss gradually decreases over a year or more.

In November of 2004, Pottruck accepted an offer to guest lecture at his alma mater, the University of Pennsylvania's Wharton School. Pottruck was on the university's board of trustees and had donated a spanking new gym in 1999. He'd even given the Wharton commencement speech in 2002. Penn had always been his safe haven.

"My leaving Schwab was on less than elegant terms," Pottruck says. "What is really humbling is to have time to reflect on what you've done and what you could have done better."

Was it still? As he strode into the room, he projected confidence, his 6-foot-1, 234-pound frame encased in a white shirt and pink tie. But his face projected something different: uncertainty. Vulnerability oozed through the armor of his monogrammed shirt. And he made the decision not to hide it. "It's new to me to be an ex-CEO," he said, a bit haltingly, his Long Island accent asserting itself. "My leaving Schwab was on less than elegant terms. It was a pretty humbling experience for me. It wasn't humbling because I was replaced. . . . What is really humbling is to have time to reflect on what you've done and what you could have done better." Pottruck's frankness seemed to surprise and delight the students, who gave him a standing ovation.

But as in any grieving process, there have also been setbacks. Pottruck, always a good sleeper, had recurring nightmares. There were snubs from people he'd mentored and speaking engagements that went away. And although he had pledged to spend more time with his children, he still slipped easily into old habits. A few months after leaving Schwab, Pottruck canceled a trip to Los Angeles to visit his son because a meeting came up.