Power

In other words, the negative is the story -- now deal with it. But how? "Don't set yourself up for the takedown," advises Rubenstein. "Tell an accurate story, a factual story. Never criticize another person directly. We talk about the issues as though we're going to be positive, but it's actually a setup for anything that's negative. The person who's reading or hearing the negative enjoys it as a feast. It psyches them up when they're down, when they're thinking, 'I'm a little person; nobody ever pays attention to me.' "

Al had it right. There are times when you have to be an SOB to be seen and heard. But remember: A little bit of empathy helps the medicine go down.

Harriet Rubin (hrubin@fastcompany. com), a Fast Company senior writer, has written two books on power. Find her columns on the Web (www.fastcompany. com/keyword/rubin).