1. Explain yourself. Dealing effectively with a problem or a setback starts with how you explain it -- to yourself and to those around you. "Too many people learn negative or helpless ways of thinking," Shatté says. "But they can unlearn them and adopt more resilient ways of thinking. Once you're aware of your explanatory style, listen for a pattern. Ask yourself why this happened, and listen to what you say." Some people tend to explain setbacks as temporary, while others view them as permanent. Do you tend to cast blame on others, or do you explain everything as your fault? Each style needs to be offset with logic and perspective.
2. Don't overreact. "In most rough situations, people tend to describe what went wrong in terms of 'always' and 'everything,' " Shatté says. For instance, when a boss criticizes part of a presentation, or report, many people say to themselves, "My reports are always bad," or, "I bet I'm one step away from getting canned." Shatté and his colleagues teach people to counter those standard overreactions with a more accurate evaluation. Most of the time, things aren't as bleak as we make them out to be.
3. Act fast, but don't rush to judgment. It's important to be honest when you run into a setback -- but it's also important to be sure you understand what's really going on. Adaptiv worked with a European company that was selling whiskey in a country that preferred vodka. The country also had an active black market. Whiskey sales had hit the skids. The company's executives blamed the sales team. Everyone knew there was a problem, and everyone rushed to judgment about the cause. The real problem, it turns out, involved the sales force's lack of training. Armed with the proper analysis, both sides worked the problem.
4. Keep it in perspective. Ask yourself: What's the worst thing that can happen? What's the best outcome that we can hope for? And then keep pressing yourself about the accuracy of those scenarios. "People most need to work on being accurate and candid about what has happened," Shatté says. "Then they can take strides to remedy the situation."
Contact Andrew Shatté by email (ajshatte@adaptivlearning.com).
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