Sidebar: End Game

Even the most poised among us sometimes turn into blithering idiots when uttering these two memorable words: "I quit."

Nancy Badore, 53, a career consultant in Dearborn, Michigan and a former director of Ford's executive development center, says that you'll have a better chance of keeping your equanimity if you map out an exit strategy -- and use it.

Decide when to go public.

"You've got an offer. Deciding whether to take it depends in part on whether you've got a bright future at your present company. In that case, the only way to find out is to have a conversation with the senior people at your company -- but only if you trust them. If you want different job responsibilities, give your employer a real chance to meet your needs. And if you don't trust your boss? Then you already know what to do."

Anticipate the inevitable question: Why?

"When you give notice, expect that your company's senior people will want to know your reasons for leaving. Keep your answer brief and professional. Discuss the opportunity, but don't gloat over your good fortune. And never compare the two jobs. The goal is to protect your reputation and to leave people feeling good about your tenure."

Schedule a transition plan.

"Once you've given notice, help your project team make a smooth transition. Discuss constructively what worked for you in your old job and what didn't, so people can make improvements for your successor. Your last impression will be a good one if you make life easier for others when you leave."

Coordinates: Nancy Badore, nbadore@aol.com

Sidebar: Quit Quiz

The way that we react to an employee's departure speaks volumes about the way that we lead, says Marilyn Moats Kennedy, 56, managing partner at Career Strategies, a consultancy in Wilmette, Illinois. Kennedy has identified three common scenarios. You're the boss: How should you respond?

1. Your star player, whom you'd considered promoting, is quitting. Do you:

A. Make a counteroffer, letting her know about the future promotion?
B. Give her the cold shoulder?
C. Say you're disappointed, and that the door is always open for her return?

Answer: C. If your company is the right fit and you've let her know that she's valued, she might change her mind. At the least, she'll be an ally after she's left.

2. You're close to firing your team's slacker. Now you hear that he's going to another company. Do you:

A. Say, "Thank goodness, because I was going to fire you"?
B. Breathe a sigh of relief, and politely ask him to leave immediately?
C. Say you can't give him a reference?

Answer: B. Hand him a brief reference letter, detailing only his length of employment and job titles. Getting him to leave quickly is best for the team.

3. Several employees leave your group within six months. Do you:

A. Give raises to the rest of the team?
B. Replay scenarios that you could have handled differently?
C. Rotate employees into different jobs?

Answer: C. People often leave because they feel that their skills are overlooked. Focus on redistributing the work.

Coordinates: Marilyn Moats Kennedy, mmkcareer@aol.com