What about getting naked? It was less awkward than I had imagined it would be. The attendants held up towels and averted their eyes at delicate moments. Besides, they were so pleasant -- managing to be both maternal and professional -- that I wanted them to be my new best friends.

What I learned from my spa journey is less a revelation than a confirmation of something I already knew: The key to getting the most out of your spa experience is knowing what you want before you go. Alan Coombs, who cofounded Green Valley Spa with his wife, Carole, made a comment that has stuck with me. "There are no bad spas," he said. "There are only bad matches. Your job is to find the right fit."

Action Item: Spa in a Bag

You're tense. You're tired. You want some freakin' pampering! But you don't have the wherewithal to jet to some exotic locale. Why not bring home a spa in a bag?

Origins, which has 40 retail stores of its own as well as 300 counters in department stores, offers products designed for that very purpose. The There's No Spa Like Home basket ($50), for example, includes this booty: Mint Condition, a lime-colored body wash made with sage and wintergreen; Liquid Clay, a foaming body and face cleanser; and the saucily named Birthday Suit, a skin softener.

If you prefer to gather your spa accoutrements à la carte, check out other Origins products, such as Salt Rub ($28.50), a body scrub made from sea salts, and the Eye Mask ($6), a gelatinous Lone Ranger-style mask that purports to relieve sinus pain and swelling. Using all of this stuff will make you feel truly ridiculous -- which is a big part of the fun.

Coordinates: Origins, 800-674-4467

Sidebar: Can You Speak Spa?

Some spas seem to exist on another planet -- so it's no surprise that the inhabitants of Spa Land speak their own language. Here's a short version of their lexicon, adapted from Jenifer Miller's Healing Centers & Retreats.

Bal-ne-o-ther-a-py (bol-ne-o-ther-e-pe), noun: Any healing treatment that involves immersion in water.

Do In (dü in), noun: A self-administered healing method.

fan-go (fan-go), noun: A type of clay that is used in body wraps.

Rolf-ing (rol-fing), noun: A system of body work developed by Ida Rolf.

salt glow (solt glo), noun: A treatment in which one's body is slathered with moist salt grains.

Coordinates: $16.95. Healing Centers & Retreats: Healthy Getaways for Every Body and Budget, John Muir Publications, 800-285-4078

Sidebar: How to Find the Right Spa

Is searching for the perfect spa stressing you out? Relax! These resources can help you find the spa that meets all of your needs.

Fodor's Healthy Escapes The1999 edition features comprehensive info on 248 spas in the United States, Mexico, Canada, and the Caribbean -- plus writeups on local attractions.

Coordinates: $18.50. Fodor's Travel Publications, www.fodors.com

Spa-Finders Ltd. This travel agency is devoted exclusively to booking spa vacations, and, in one phone call, it will put together a package that caters to your needs. Also check out their Web site, where you can research more than 500 spas worldwide.

Coordinates: 800-255-7727, www.spafinders.com

-- Marni Futterman

Sidebar: 7 Ways to Make the Most of Your Stay

How can you ensure that your spa experience will be as rewarding as possible? We asked Jenifer Miller, former editor of Spa magazine, for seven of her best tips.

Make the right match. "The best way to find out whether a spa is right for you is to talk to people who have been there."

Consider the season. "You'll get more attention during the slow season, which varies according to each spa's location."

Don't arrive fashionably late. "Plan on checking in around 2 p.m. That gives the hotel enough time to prepare your room -- and it gives you enough time to take in some afternoon activities."

It's not about other people. "I've heard people say, 'These staffers are so buff and energetic.' People feel that they can't live up to that level of conditioning or that they don't have that energy level. Just relax -- this is your time."

Rise and shine. "Your first morning activity might begin at 5:30, and breakfast may not be served until 9. If you can't last that long without eating, request some fruit the night before."

Easy does it. "Don't overschedule yourself. Remember that you're there to relax and that you'll need some downtime."

Be realistic. "You won't leave a spa looking like a supermodel -- unless you came in looking like one."