Stress Less - Profiles

Merge Your Family and Your Work

Stress Manager Kailash Narayan, 51, who lives in Agoura Hills, California. In 1995 he launched LIFELINE International, which advises clients like ARCO, Allied Signal, and Owens Corning on employee health and productivity. He worked at ARCO for 27 years, enduring company-wide reorganizations.

Frazzle Factor: Balancing work and family.

When I set my company up back in January 95, I worked out of my home. One day when the business line rang with an important call, my son, who was 14 at the time, picked it up. After I took the call, I yelled at him -- he made me look unprofessional. He yelled back, accusing me of hogging all the phone lines. A few months later, I leased office space away from home, but that just changed the problem from annoying my family to ignoring them. And my temper wasn't getting any better.

Solution #5: Get your family involved in your work.

Soon after the argument with my son, I held an off-site "board of directors" meeting with my entire family. I put them up in a posh LA hotel for a weekend. I gave them a formal business presentation -- I charted my new company's goals and explained how we were going to achieve them. They gave me some great feedback, and we all started sharing the same vision.

Frazzle Factor: Getting reorganized -- twice.

When I was working at ARCO, we had a major downsizing in 1986, I had to move from engineering to business analysis. I suffered quite a bit -- it was like dying and being reborn again in a completely new career. I was so overcome with worry that I found it increasingly difficult to concentrate.

Solution #6: In times of turmoil, know your goals.

Many people who leave corporate jobs are still stressed out years later, because they never decided what they really wanted to do with the rest of their lives. After the first reorganization, I realized how critical it is to have a clearly defined personal mission. So I wrote it down. Every time I get stressed out, I look at my mission statement and ask myself why I'm tense. Whatever the reason, it's never the end of the world.

Solution #7: Build skills to increase your sense of control.

Too many employees have blinders on and ignore the resources that are available to them. I try to learn and stretch myself in other areas -- for example, I work on improving my computer and public speaking skills, and I think of myself as a one-man business. Reading has been critical for me : Stephen Covey's "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People" (Fireside, 1990) encouraged me to write down my personal mission statement.

Solution #7: Take control.

If you do something on a daily basis, a hobby or an exercise program, you'll gain a sense of control. For me, it's walking and reading. Nobody can prevent me from doing them. They've given me the confidence to take control of my career. And when you feel like you're in control, you're far less likely to get stressed.

What Doesn't Work: Short-term fixes.

I've tried meditation, deep breathing, and listening to classical music and relaxation tapes. They seemed to work at the time. But when stress symptoms reappeared later on, its clear that they weren't treating the cause.

Coordinates: Kailash Narayan, (kailash@lifelines.com); http://www.lifelines.com

Lighten Your Load with Levity

Stress Manager Laura Kelly, 40, assistant vice president for risk management at USAA, is responsible for insuring the $22 billion in assets of this diversified financial-services company.

Frazzle Factor: Making big decisions when uncertainty is a constant.

We purchase property insurance policies several times each year, and a bad decision could easily cost the company $20 million. But there's never enough information. I wake up in the middle of the night, worrying whether I'm doing the right Thing.

Solution #8: Keep a sense of humor and perspective.

When I'm negotiating price with insurers, I'll always say something like, 'We're a great company, so why don't you insure us for free?' It lets them know that I'm not going to take their price and it releases tension. You don't have to say something that's knee-slapping funny -- you just want to keep people from becoming too testy.

Solution #9: Work out.

I exercise three to four mornings per week -- two miles of running and 30 minutes of weight training. I get out of bed with my gym clothes on, go directly to the gym, and then get dressed for work -- it cuts down on the hassle of dressing twice. Running helps me clear my head, work the bad things out of my system, and brainstorm about the day's problems.

What Doesn't Work: Relaxing and doing nothing.

Some people think that doing nothing is relaxing. That doesn't work: doing nothing is stressful because I'm hyperactive. It's not the lack of activity that helps relieve stress, but the variety of activities. For me, juggling gardening, running, horseback riding, painting, skiing, and swimming keeps my mind off my work worries.

Coordinates: Laura Kelly, (lgkelly@concentric.net)

Eric Matson is a member of the Fast Company editorial staff.