Unrelenting Anger Causes Disease

FC Member Blog

BY Kelly Jad'onThu Feb 14, 2008 at 9:23 PM

This blog is written by a member of our blogging community and expresses that member's views alone.

Many people carry around loads of baggage from their pasts, full of anger, resentment, and frustration, never affecting the person(s) who are the receivers of this indignation. The victim is the individual who cannot get beyond his hatred, and instead internalizes it, causing harm to himself both emotionally, and sometimes physically. Psychological stress from high levels of anger has been found to be an underlying factor in coronary heart disease and hypertension.

The answer is forgiveness. Forgiveness is the mental process of ridding yourself of the feelings of resentment, indignation, or anger against another person for a perceived offense, difference, or mistake. It may also mean the stopping of the demand of punishment or restitution. In plain English it may mean pushing that chip off your shoulder.

12 years ago my father was sitting on his motorcycle on the side of Interstate 95, under an overpass, avoiding the rain. He had his helmet on and his back to traffic. A voice in his head told him he'd better move closer to the guardrail. Too late to do so, a woman driving a car swerved to the right, removing both the left side of the bike and my father's left leg. Scared, Esther--the driver, took off and then returned before my dad asked her to call 911. The reason for the accident--Esther had dropped her cell phone, and while bending to retrieve it, turned the steering wheel slightly to the right.

My father carried extreme resentment toward Esther for the last 12 years, until he died. I've repeated Dad's story several times, and most listeners, especially the men, understand how my father felt. If we however, learn to forgive, we may be able to improve how we feel physically. My dad did indeed have hypertension, diabetes, and terminal cancer. Did the unrelenting anger play a role? Some think so.

Jeffrey Brantley, MD. and Wendy Millstine, NC. have written Five Good Minutes With The One You Love. They cite the following methods as ways to heal the animosity in relationships:

First, walk off the grudge. Work out the potential anger and let loose some bitterness. Guys, get to the gym!

Second, visualize a good image. For example, a litter of puppies, a plate of warm cookies, or a long hug.

Third, focus where these feelings reside in your body. Do you find yourself smiling? Does your heart feel a little warmer?

Fourth, say, "I am walking to forgive, to have mercy, and to let go of my hostility. When I have forgiveness in my heart, I can move freely without negative feelings and ill will." Here you are making a conscious decision to let go of the resentment--both physically and mentally.