I was talking to a dear friend and fellow Coach the other day about ‘waiting for a crisis to change our ways of being’ as it applies in all aspects of our life, work, personal relationships, and health, as well as the health of an organization.
To say human beings process things in a certain way, in this case waiting until things are ‘broken,’ is to give validity to a perspective or paradigm that doesn’t serve us. Why wait for a crisis to implement change or rethink and reinvent something? Why not just create something incredible to start with, when everything is already good?
Could it be we automatically settle because amazing things happen to someone else, not us? Is it possible we don’t want to ‘press our luck’? Many have a hard time getting past their successes and so stop dead halfway to their dreams. Many become workaholics and yet won’t redefine their lives until their partner is about to ‘walk.’ There are those who won’t redefine how a company operates until it’s in crisis and about to go under. Why wait until the last moment when digging yourself out is so much harder than building something new on a foundation of great?
I believe we can do our best when we have the conversations we need to have with people in all fields of practice. It’s not just talking to clients or colleagues, it’s talking to everyone and anyone to find out their story, how they got to where they are. How does it apply to you?
Questions I ask my clients are simple yet shine a light on what they have to pay attention to. One of the key questions is "What aren't you thinking of?" That might sound strange yet those who stumble and feel as if they can't figure out why they're stagnating are looking at the same solutions they tried over and over again. What haven't they tried? What haven't they paid attention to? As a Coach that's one of my main focuses....to make sure I can help them see beyond the immediate.
The second question is "Who do you need to talk to that you haven't spoken to yet and what does that conversation have to look like?" Again people have a wealth of knowledge and wisdom, however if it doesn't apply to you or where you dream of going then you have to ask the right questions to get the right answers. So again I ask "What does that conversation have to look like?"
Sometimes what I do as a coach isn't adding something; often it's the removal of something which might be an assumption, an expectation or a judgment. Remove what stands in your way and there is clear sailing. No ceiling...just sky!
So to leave you with one last question, "What do you need to know that you don't know?"
Remember, no ceiling, just sky.
Related Stories: | Topics: |
Email
Digg
StumbleUpon
Facebook
Buzz Up!
LinkedIn
Recent Comments | 4 Total
June 16, 2008 at 9:33pm by Jay Tatum
I agree with the direction this post is going. I think the real issue is the level of inquiry with which we typically approach what we are doing or "how" we are being. I know that sounds a bit awkward, but bear with me. The thought that we operate in crisis mode suggests we are being more reactive than proactive. And what this post suggests is to be more proactive, with the emphasis on "being" proactive.
I find that having coffee once a week with a group of folks from different disciplines is a great way to keep that level of inquiry growing. I don't know a thing about a great many other disciplines but having a regular exchange between a pig farmer, cleric, physicist, and banker can be a hoot! Imagine what we could do with an IT Professional and an Educator. My point, though, is that we each have something to offer the other in addition to just Fun Company! We offer another level of inquiry into whatever is going on that week. We haven't solved all the worlds problems yet but I bet we raised $500,000 in charity over the past ten years without really trying. Not a bad place to start. Imagine what we could do if you joined the conversation!
June 16, 2008 at 9:47pm by Dennis AuBuchon
I find that networking with other individuals with common interests and different background is a way to increase our knowledge and capabilities. I have found that networking groups offer a means to develop contacts that may not otherwise have taken place. I belong to a networking group where I found people of similar interest and causes. Without networking of any kind we would not be who we are or who we will become. It is not just about being proactive but being open to new ideas and experiences which shape who we are.
June 16, 2008 at 9:47pm by Donna Karlin
It's amazing how my own comments keep getting zapped on here! OK...trying again. Thanks Jay. You keep me on my toes that's for sure!
When I teach, and this is to Master Coaches with a great deal of experience and expertise, the first thing I ask them to do is to park their assumptions about what they already know to open their mind to what they don't. Once they do, they get it and I watch them just fly. It's awesome. The first night of the first day of class I also invite them to join me for dinner, at their cost, so we can continue the conversation...not about methodologies, but about life and their stories and the impact they want to make.
I can imagine how amazing that conversation over coffee would be. Life coming together from so many perspectives.
Thanks for taking the time to write. May the conversations continue!
Best, always Jay
Donna
--
abetterperspective.com
executive and political leadership coaching
June 16, 2008 at 9:50pm by Donna Karlin
Dennis...
I facilitate a gymbouree for just that purpose so clients with common areas of expertise can put their best practices forward as well as share issues so I can coach the group through that conversation. VERY powerful1
--
abetterperspective.com
executive and political leadership coaching