February 9, 2009
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Self confidence is one of the keys to success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success. If you want to become self confident you need to do three things. 1) Become and optimist. 2) Face your fears and act. 3) Surround yourself with positive people.
In my experience, grandparents are some of the most positive people in the world. My grandma and grandpa lived upstairs from us when I was growing up. They were always there for me. I remember many happy hours sitting at their kitchen table talking with them and listening to their stories – and escaping the wrath of my parents when I screwed up.
The other day, I came across some advice that Will Smith’s grandmother gave him. “Don’t let failure go to your heart, or success go to your head.” This is not only great common sense advice, it captures the essence of self confidence. Self confident people have a realistic view of themselves, their strengths and weaknesses.
I discussed this idea in Straight Talk for Success…
“A healthy, realistic self image is key to your confidence. Remind yourself of this the next time you are out performed (and you will be) and when you out perform others (which you will as well).
“Don’t let yourself feel inferior just because you fail at a task or are not good at something. On the other hand, don’t let yourself feel superior because you succeed at a task or are good at something. Keep things in perspective.
“I once saw a quote from Herb Elliot that sums it up quite well. In case you don’t know Herb Elliot (and I didn’t until I read this quote), he was the world record holder in the mile run from 1958 to 1962. He said:
“‘To be a world-record holder in the mile, a man must have the arrogance it takes to believe he can run faster that anyone ever has at the distance; and the humility it takes to actually do it.’
“To me, the dichotomies in this quote – arrogance and humility – capture the essence of self confidence and realistic self image. Arrogance: ego, belief that you can accomplish the goal you set for yourself. Humility: the willingness to do the work necessary to reach your goal. Both are present in successful people.”
Let's use some examples here. If you asked me to find a receipt from last month, it may take me another month for me to find it. The odds of me walking to the moon are greater than me successfully reformatting your hard drive, and if you are proofreading my writing, you may discover the most creative spellings ever. These are not my skill sets.
On the other hand, a lot of the people who can do these things would have their knees buckle two seconds after they walked out onto a stage with 1,000 eyeballs staring at them. I love being in front of a crowd, sharing my thoughts on personal and professional success.
Do I allow myself to feel inferior because of the things that I am not good at? Not in a million years... and no one has permission to make me feel inferior. On the other hand, do I allow my ego to inflate because I’m good at speaking in front of large audiences? No. I better not. Stop me if you see my ego getting out of control.
The common sense point here is simple. Successful people are self confident. Self confident people follow Will Smith’s grandmother’s advice: “Don’t let failure go to your heart, and don’t let success go to your head.” Remember too, that a balanced self image is a key component of self confidence. Arrogance plus humility equals a balanced self image. It’s simple common sense. You can believe in yourself all you want, but you have to do the work in order to succeed. On the other hand, you can work your tail off, but if you don’t believe in yourself, you’re unlikely to succeed.
That’s my take on failure, success, arrogance and humility. What’s your? Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us. As always, thanks for reading.
Bud
PS: Yesterday, I watched the “60 Minutes” feature on Captain Sully Sullenberger and the crew of the US Airways flight that went down in the Hudson River on January 15. I was surprised to see that one of my high school classmates, Doreen Welch, was one of the flight attendants on that flight. Way to go Doreen. I’m proud of you. You are courageous and inspirational. You’ve made me and all of Ambridge Area High School proud.
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January 29, 2009
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Dynamic communication skills are one of the keys to success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success. If you want to become a dynamic communicator, you need to master three skills: 1) conversation, 2) writing and 3) presentations.
I am helping a friend write a book. She has a compelling story to tell – born in a “little house on stilts” with no running water or electricity in the middle of a sugar cane plantation in Puerto Rico, retired as the Chief HR Officer for one of the largest companies in the world.
I am helping her gather her thoughts by doing a series of interviews that will become the first draft of her book. An interview is nothing more than a conversation. And in conducting the interviews with my friend, I have learned again the importance of silence to becoming a good conversationalist.
As she spoke in an interview we did yesterday, I found myself wanting to do two things: jump in and ask more questions as she was speaking, or add thoughts of my own. Neither of these practices is particularly helpful in establishing a good rhythm for a conversation. The second is worse. I was interviewing her to hear her story – not to tell mine.
I found that if I just listened, and occasionally muttered an encouraging “uh uh,” she did fine. She was into the flow, and answered many of the questions I would have asked her in a more complete manner than if I had interrupted the conversation to ask them. Many of the real nuggets of wisdom came toward the end of her answers. Most of them came after a five or ten second pause.
There is an important message here if you want to develop your conversation skills. Don’t be afraid of silence in a conversation. Most often, silence means that a person is merely gathering his or her thoughts. They are thinking about what to say next. Silence helps conversations. It shows that you are paying attention to what is being said and not preparing an answer or rebuttal as it is being said. It also allows the person with whom you are in conversation, the time to think through what he or she wants to add to what has already been said. Try being quiet the next time you are in a conversation. I guarantee you’ll get better quality information and learn more than if you fill every moment with words.
The common sense point here is simple. Successful people are dynamic communicators. Dynamic communicators are great conversationalists. Silence is an important, but often underused conversation technique. Get comfortable with silence. Give the other person time to gather his or her thoughts instead of jumping in as soon as he or she has stopped talking -- worse yet, interrupting him or her in the middle of a thought. Good conversationalists are good listeners. Good listeners are comfortable with silence.
That’s my take on the importance of silence and conversations. What’s yours? Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts. As always, thanks for reading.
Bud
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January 28, 2009
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Outstanding performance is one of the keys to success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success. If you want to become an outstanding performer you need to do three things. 1) Stay up to date in your field by becoming a lifelong learner. 2) Set and achieve high goals. 3) Manage your time, life and stress well.
Stress can have a negative impact on your ability to perform. Unfortunately today’s world is a very stressful place. If you watched the news on Monday, you saw that big companies such as Caterpillar, Pfizer, Sprint Nextel, Home Depot and General Motors, announced cuts adding up to 45,000 jobs lost. Economists predict many more job losses to come in 2009. Add that to the economic meltdown at the end of 2008, significant drops in retirement account values, as well as the continuing wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, and you can see why many people are really stressed right now.
I’m a bit stressed myself, and I’m a positive person by nature.
I don’t bring up all of this to add to your stress. Rather, my intent is to help. The other day, I was discussing how stress can have a negative impact on performance with Nancy Ring, one of my colleagues in the Creating We Institute (www.creatingweinstitute.com). She told me about a great site called Heart Math (www.HeartMath.com) dedicated to reducing stress and enhancing your quality of life.
Registration is free, and once you register you can take a free on line stress test. I took this test. It is the most comprehensive one of its kind that I have seen. The test gave me instant results as well as suggestions for what I could do to reduce the primary stressors in my life. If you want to take the test, go to www.HeartMath.com and click on “personal growth.” Scroll down and click on “Stress and Well Being Survey.”
You will find results for the five categories that the folks at Heart Math are important for living a vital, stress free and productive life: Physical Vitality, Emotional Vitality, Social Connectedness, Spiritual Connectedness and Overall Well Being. In areas where your scores indicate a potential problem, you will be provided with some advice on how best to deal with this problem.
Everything above, including some newsletters are free. But, as you might have guessed, these folks are selling stuff too. I have several colleagues who have participated in some of their programs and who use some of their biofeedback devices and they have been impressed. I am not a Heart Math affiliate by the way.
The common sense point here is simple. Successful people are outstanding performers. Among other things, outstanding performers manage their time, life and stress well. Stress is rampant in today’s world. Heart Math (www.HeartMath.com) offers a comprehensive stress test and some tools for helping you successfully manage the stress in your life. Log on and take the stress survey. It will help you pin point the reasons for the stress in your life, and give you some helpful ideas about what to do about it.
That’s my take on performance and stress. What’s yours? What’s stressing you the most right now? Please leave a comment or ask a question about the stress in your life. I’m sure that as a community, either I or another reader will be able to help you. As always, thanks for reading.
Bud
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January 27, 2009
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The ability to create positive personal impact is one of the keys to success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success. If you want to create positive personal impact you need to do three things. 1) Build and nurture your unique personal brand. 2) Be impeccable in your presentation of self – in person and on line. 3) Know and follow the basic rules of etiquette.
Jonnelle Marte had a great little piece in the Wall Street Journal Sunday on January 25: “Build a Page on the Web.” She quoted my friend Dan Schwabel, a personal branding expert who says that everybody should have a personal website. “A web site is your way of owning your Google results. It can help your name come up when people search for your area of expertise.”
I agree with Dan. A personal web site with tabs that cover the basics – work experience, education, community service, personal information – is a great way to get your name out there. Employers Google prospective employees as a matter of course these days. Spending a few minutes putting together a basic web site will help your name come up when you get Googled.
Purchasing a domain name is the first step in setting up a personal web page. If your name is Bud Bilanich, you are likely to be the only one whose name comes up when an employer Googles you. Therefore, you don’t have to put much thought into the name you will buy to set up your domain. You can see my website at www.BudBilanich.com. On the other hand, if your name is Joe Smith or Mary Jones, you might have to get more creative in purchasing your domain name. Use a middle initial, or use your given name in full. In my case this would be LeRoy J Bilanich. I guarantee you won’t find too many people with than name on the web.
I find that Go Daddy (www.godaddy.com) is the best place to purchase your domain. Type in the name you want, and Go Daddy will let you know if it is available. If the name you want is not available, Go Daddy will suggest some alternatives for you.
The next step is to set up the page. I Googled “free web templates” and found a site called, surprisingly enough, Free Web Templates (www.freewebtemplates.com). They claim to have 4,265 free web templates for download. You should be able to find one that suits you there. In the interest of full disclosure, I have no affiliate relationship with Free Web Templates. If you don’t like them, Google returned over 24,300,000 hits for the search term “free web templates.”
I think a blog is a good way to add a little personality to your web page. You can link to your blog by creating another tab on your website. WordPress has free and easy to use blogging software. If you decide to set up a blog, I suggest that you focus it on something related to your work or profession. Also, if you set up a blog, make sure that you post to it at least once a week.
If you don’t want to set up a separate web page, you can use Visual CV (www.visualcv.com) . Visual CV is an easy to use on line resume template. I use it. You can see my Visual CV at www.visualcv.com/bilanich. The biggest problem with Visual CV is the way in which the web address works. Visual CV appears before your name, so Google might not pick up your name. However, it is a valuable resource. I suggest creating both a personal web page and a Visual CV. In that way, you’ll be more likely to be found when a prospective employer or partner Googles you.
Finally, list your website on your business card, resume and social networking sites to which you belong. LinkedIn is the best social networking site for business. 42 Rules for 24 Hour Success on LinkedIn is a great book for learning how to use LinkedIn to help you look for a job and to build and maintain a strong network once you’re employed. It’s available at www.42Rules.com and at Amazon.com.
The common sense point here is simple. Successful people create positive personal impact. If you want to create positive personal impact, you need to be impeccable in your presentation of self – in person and on line. This means that you not only need to dress for success, you need to have a simple, easy to find web presence. A web site in your name is a great way to start. Once you get your personal website up and running, consider blogging and social networking on LinkedIn. Also, it is a good idea to set up an online resume using Visual CV.
That’s my take on using personal websites to create positive personal impact. What’s yours? Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us. I really appreciate all of your comments. As always, thanks for reading.
Bud
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January 26, 2009
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Self confidence is one of the keys to success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success. If you want to become self confident you need to do three things. 1) Become an optimist. 2) Face your fears and act. 3) Surround yourself with positive people.
Kay Yow was one of the most positive and optimistic people you’ve never met. She passed away on Saturday, January 24. She had been the Women’s Head Basketball Coach at North Carolina State University for the past 34 years. She coached two teams that won Olympic Gold Medals. She was an assistant coach in 1984 and the head coach in 1988. Her teams won four Atlantic Coast Conference tournament championships; earned 20 NCAA tournament bids; and reached the Final Four in 1998. She was inducted into the Naismith Basketball Hall of Fame in 2002. In 2007, North Carolina State named their home floor “Kay Yow Court” in her honor.
She also battled breast cancer for 22 years. She was first diagnosed the year before she coached the US team to the gold medal at the Seoul Olympics. She had a mastectomy, underwent chemo and kept coaching.
Kay Yow’s cancer returned with a vengeance in 2006. She took a 16 game leave to focus on her treatments during the 2006-07 season. She returned to coaching and her won 12 of its final 15 games beating women’s basketball powerhouses – and big time NC State rivals Duke and North Carolina. Her players wore pink shoelaces in honor of their coach. That team got into the NCAA tournament and made it to the Sweet 16. She was so weak during those games that she spent most of her time sitting on the bench. Her assistant coaches stood to shout instructions to players, and helped her to her feet during time outs.
In an interview after the 2007 sesaon, she said,
“I have to go through it. I accept that, and I'm not panicked about it because the Lord is in control. But it just would be so saddening if I had to go through it and I couldn't help people. But then I see I'm helping others in a greater way than I ever have. That's the amazing thing, you know?”
Pat Summit is the Women’s Head Basketball Coach at the University of Tennessee. She also has more wins and more national titles than any other women’s basketball coach. Kay Yow was her assistant coach in the 1984 Olympics. She said,
“Kay has just been a great friend to so many people; obviously left her footprints all over the place with the kids she has taught and molded. And she is a woman that had fought such a hard fight, but it was always about everyone else, never about Kay. In the two decades she fought the disease, Kay never allowed herself to be victimized by cancer. Kay never pitied herself.”
And that’s the common sense point for today. Stuff happens, bad stuff like cancer. None of have control over what happens to us. We do, however, have control over how we react to the things that happen to us. Self confident people like Kay Yow use the bad stuff that happens to them to set an example for others. They remain optimistic. They face their fears and go on with their life. They set a positive example for others. As the Optimist Creed says, they are “too large for worry, to noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.” I remember watching Kay Yow coach during the 2006-07 season. It was clear that she was very sick and weak. It was also clear that she was an inspiration to her assistant coaches and players. She was an inspiration.
If you want to honor Kay Yow’s memory, you can make a donation to the KayYow/WBCA Cancer Fund at www.JimmyV.org. If you want a copy of The Optimist Creed to hang in your office got to: http://bbilanich.typepad.com/success_common_sense/2008/12/the-optimist-creed.html.
That’s my take on Kay Yow and self confidence – and optimism, courage to face her fears and being a positive person. What’s yours? There are many others who have fought cancer with dignity, most not as well known as Kay Yow. Please leave a comment sharing the cancer story of anyone you would like to honor. We all can benefit from hearing others’ stories of tragedy and triumph. As always, thanks for reading.
Bud
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January 19, 2009
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Chesley B. “Sully” Sullenberger III is a hero. I’m sure you know by now that he safely landed a US Airways Airbus A320 with 155 passengers and crew on board on the Hudson River last Thursday. And then walked the cabin – twice – to make sure no one was on board before he left the aircraft. Everybody survived. It’s a pretty amazing story.
When I watched the news coverage that night, I thought, “There’s a man who is totally confident in his skills as a pilot.”
Self confidence is one of the keys to success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success. If you want to become self confident you need to do three things: 1) become an optimist; 2) face your fears and act, and 3) surround yourself with positive people.
Sully Sullenberger certainly exemplifies the first two of these traits.
However, I believe there is one other thing that contributed to Sully’s confidence in his ability to land a plane on a river: preparation. Since 1980, He has been a pilot with US Airways. He has trained pilots, helped streamline passenger service, led efforts to improve safety at airports, aided the National Transportation Safety Board in investigating accidents and co-wrote a technical paper with NASA on crew decision-making errors. Before joining US Airways, he was a fighter pilot. He graduated from the US Air Force Academy.
He is the former safety chairman of the Air Line Pilots Association, and is a visiting scholar at the Center for Catastrophic Risk Management at the University of California, Berkeley. The research center studies natural and man-made disasters from floods to airplane crashes.
I wouldn’t want to be on a plane that had to ditch in a river, but if I had to be, I’d want Sully Sullenberger to be the pilot. He was as prepared as anyone to do the job.
He was prepared because of his training, over 40 years of flying experience and his outside work and continuing education. From what I can tell, Sully Sullenberger knows as much or more about flying, decision making in stressful situations and airplane accidents as any else. He was prepared to do something incredibly difficult when the time came. He acted in a calm and confident manner.
We can all take a lesson from Sully Sullenberger. No matter what you do, the more prepared you are, the more confident you will be in your ability to handle routine matters and the occasional crisis.
An early mentor used to always tell me, “Bud, preparation makes up for a lack of talent.” In Sully Sullenberger’s case preparation enhanced his prodigious flying talent.
The common sense point here is simple. Successful people are self confidence. Preparation enhances self confidence. When you anticipate and mentally rehearse what you’ll do when you find yourself in a difficult situation, you’ll have the confidence to act swiftly and surely when you find yourself in that situation. Just ask Sully Sullenberger. You can’t prepare for very possible contingency, but you can identify likely problems and opportunities and prepare for them in advance. Doing so will improve not only your confidence, it will improve your performance under pressure.
That’s my take on the importance of preparation to self confidence. What’s yours? Have you ever been in a difficult situation in which you acted quickly and confidently because of your preparation? If so, please share your story with us. As always, thanks for reading.
Bud
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January 16, 2009
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Interpersonal competence is one of the keys to success that I discuss in "Straight Talk for Success." If you want to become interpersonally competent, you need to do three things. 1) Get to know yourself, use this self knowledge to better understand others. 2) Build and maintain solid long term relationships with the important people in your life. 3) Learn how to resolve conflict with minimal disruptions to your relationships.
In "The Little Teal Book of Trust," Jeffrey Gitomer says, “Trust is the basis for all relationships.” I agree. It is very difficult, if not impossible to build solid relationships without a foundation of trust.
I have built my consulting on business on a simple process. First I focus on getting people to like me. Once they like me, I work on getting them to trust me. Once they trust me, I work on selling them my consulting, coaching and speaking services. This simple three step model has served me well over the past 20 years.
Here are the ten suggestions Jeffrey has for building trust:
• Tell the truth. This is the number one element of trust and relationships.
• Do what you say you will do. This is a test of being trustworthy and reliable.
• Communicate in a timely manner. This shows you are responsible, on top of it, and that you care.
• Bring value beyond your product or service. What you do to help others be more successful is a true reflection of your character.
• Be on time. Being on time shows you respect the other person’s time.
• Be friendly. Smiling people are the gateway to open communication.
• Be sincere. This can only come from belief in what you do, loving what you do, and caring for others.
• Show and say genuine thanks. Be grateful for the opportunity to be of service.
• Be consistent. I believe this element of trust is the most difficult to master because it combines all the other elements.
• Give trust. You become trustworthy by giving trust.
I particularly like Jeffrey’s last point. One of my first mentors once told me to “give away what you want.” If you want respect, give respect to the people in your life. If you want love, give love to the people in your life. And, as Jeffrey Gitomer points out, if you want people to trust you, trust them.
By extending yourself and giving trust before you know it will be reciprocated, you will brand yourself as a trusting person, someone others will be more inclined to trust. This is the same idea that Roger Fisher and William Ury express in one of my favorite books, "Getting to Yes." In negotiations, they advise their readers to, “Proceed independent of trust.” In other words, act as if you trust the other person and what he or she says. This is just another way of saying, “Give trust.’
The common sense point here is simple. Successful people are interpersonally competent. If you want to become interpersonally competent, you need to build strong relationships with the people in your life. Trust is the basis of all strong relationships. Jeffrey Gitomer’s new book, "The Little Teal Book of Trust" is must reading for anyone who wants to learn how to build relationships through trust. The single most important point in the book is to gain trust by giving trust. This may be difficult for you at first, but as you go about building relationships by extending trust to others, you’ll find that the vast majority of people are trustworthy and will not take advantage of your good will and trust.
That’s my take on building relationships by extending trust. What’s yours? Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts and stories. As always, I thank you for reading.
Bud
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January 15, 2009
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Dynamic communication is one of the keys to success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success. If you want to become a dynamic communicator, you need to master three skills: 1) conversation, 2) writing, and 3) presenting.
Among other things, conversation skills are important for networking. Networking, whether formal or informal, is an important way to build the relationships that can greatly enhance your personal and professional success.
I read a funny/sad article in the January issue of “Harvard Magazine” called “Making Mingling Manageable” by Christian Flow a Harvard Junior. In the article, Christian describes “the strange science of mingling: a discipline that demands moving through a room full of people you don’t know, minimizing silences, and somehow contriving that a few of those present remember your name” – in other words a networking nightmare.
Christian is pretty witty. Early on in his college career he decided he didn’t like mingling events. But he had to attend some. Here is what he has to say…
“I tried to steer clear of mingling events. If I did have to go, I skipped the pleasantries and started asking questions that were calculated to throw the conversation off the beaten path…I tried to go no limits. I was Ken Kesey and his bus full of Merry Pranksters, but instead of doing LSD and messing with policemen, I was speaking a little too directly and messing with the bounds of conversation. And, like the Pranksters, I cultivated a disdain for smooth operators and politicking. If you played within the system, you perpetuated the system. And that mean more terrible mingling events.”
Christian is a pretty introspective guy though, and he soon came to this conclusion…
“When I look hard at my conversational boundary-pressing, it occurs to me that, in its own way, it has the contrived and strategic air I claim to detest in standard cocktail party conversation; that its benefits were somewhat limited, and that it was, at its root, nothing but a calculated defense mechanism. Instead of confronting awkwardness and inanity, I had been finding my own inane way to run away.”
Good for Christian. He realized two important things: 1) sarcasm and cynicism don’t make one a dynamic communicator, and 2) in order to become a personal and profession success, he need to become a good conversationalist, even in situations where he knows no one or only a few people.
The common sense point here is simple. Networking and mingling events are meant to help people connect and build relationships. No matter how uncomfortable they may be for you, staying away from them hampers your long term prospects for personal and professional success. And, as Christian Flow found out, approaching them as a smart ass doesn’t do you much good either. If you want to become a good networker you need to become a good conversationalist. The best conversationalists ask a lot of questions. They really try to get to know the other person. They listen carefully to the responses to their questions and they respond appropriately and with empathy. Try this – ask, listen, respond with empathy -- approach to conversation and networking the next time you find yourself in a group of strangers. It works. I guarantee it. It’s only common sense.
That’s my take on conversation skills and networking. What’s yours? Please leave a comment sharing any of your funny and/or embarrassing networking moments, and what you learned from them. As always, you have my deepest thanks and appreciation for taking the time to read this post.
Bud
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January 14, 2009
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Outstanding performance is one of the keys to personal and professional success that I discuss in Straight Talk for Success. If you want to become an outstanding performer, you need to do three things. 1) Stay technically competent and up to date in your field by becoming a lifelong learner. 2) Set and achieve high goals. 3) Get organized. Manage your time, life and stress well.
If you read this blog, you know that I am a big proponent of the S.M.A.R.T. (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Results Oriented, Time Bound) method of goal setting. Try it. It works.
If you want, send me your 2009 goals and I will help you smarten them up.
However, it’s not enough to set good goals, you have to work them. The best way to work your goals is to break them down into projects and tasks. In other words, first determine the major things you need to accomplish in order to reach your goal. I call these milestones, many people call them projects.
Once you have identified your projects or milestones you need to create a list of tasks that will result in you reaching your milestone or completing your project. Set up a tickler system to help keep you on track.
You can do all of this on line. GTD Agenda (Getting Things Done) is a great website devoted to helping you accomplish your goals. They have a free plan that lets you track three goals, five projects and unlimited tasks. If you like it, you can buy the basic plan for $4.45 a month which lets you track up to 30 goals and 50 tasks – more than any sane person should ever need.
In the interest of full disclosure, I am not an affiliate for GTD Agenda. I am, however, using it to track my three major goals for 2009. I think it is a great service. I urge you to give it a try. Even if you don’t sign up, the www.gtdagenda.com site provides a great tutorial on what you need to do to track and meet your 2009 goals.
Joe’s Goals, www.joesgoals.com, is another goal management site. Although if you take a look at it, you will see that Joe’s Goals is really set up to help you manage tasks. Some people I know really like it. Check it out. Maybe you will too.
The common sense point here is simple. Outstanding performance is a key to professional and personal success. Setting and achieving high goals is a key to outstanding performance. Setting S.M.A.R.T. goals is a good start. However, once you set your goals, you have to work them. Break your goals into projects and your projects into tasks. Keep track of your progress. www.gtdagenda.com provides an easy to use way to track your goals to ensure you are on track to achieve them.
That’s my take on goal setting and goal achievement. What’s yours? Please leave a comment sharing your stories about achieving your goals. Also, if you have an alternative to getagenda.com please share it with us. Thanks for reading.
Bud
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January 13, 2009
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As I point out in my Amazon.com bestseller, Straight Talk for Success, successful people create positive personal impact. If you want to create positive personal impact, you need to do three things: 1) build and nurture your unique personal brand; 2) be impeccable in your presentation of self – in person and on line; and 3) know and follow the basic rules of etiquette.
Sunday’s Denver Post had a very interesting column on managing your on line presence by Michael Koenigs, a senior at Harvard. In part, Michael said…
“We publicize our own lives. Students post candid party pictures on Facebook, videos on YouTube, and diaries on Blogspot for all to see. We document our everyday lives in unprecedented ways. But in addition to our own efforts, companies like Google and Yahoo monitor our online behavior, share our personal emails with third parties, and save our videos and chats…Much of what is posted on the web is beyond our control.
“Future politicians will be haunted not by whether they inhaled in college, but by whether their former friends posted pictures of their prodigal behavior. Peers with cellphone cameras have replaced the paparazzi. Partygoers playfully shout ‘blackmail photo’ seconds after snapping photos of students making out or drinking from a keg.
“By blurring the boundary between public and private lives, social networking sites have become intertwined with our most personal interactions. But the ease and efficiency with which these sites allow people to communicate and share photos ensures that they will continue to play a significant role in our culture. Their mark on politics, education and personal interaction has only just begun.”
Michael makes some great points. I used to think of being impeccable in your presentation of self as dressing well and looking good. But as Michael points out, you need to pay attention to not only how you dress, but what you post on line and what other people post about you as well.
Anita Shreve’s latest book, Testimony, is a novel that depicts how several lives disintegrated as a result of an unfortunate combination of too much alcohol, poor judgment and a camcorder at an eastern boarding school.
This doesn’t mean you should have no fun, but it does mean you need to pay close attention to your behavior at all times. In some ways that’s too bad. I know that I wouldn’t want to have many of my college, or young adult, exploits posted on the web.
Regardless of what you might think, employers do Google prospective employees. Today, your on line image cannot be separated from your in person image.
Many people have a variety of on line accounts. I’m an old guy and I have accounts at LinkedIn, Facebook, MySpace, Plaxo, Yahoo 360, Success Television, Jason’s Network and Duct Tape Marketing Workbench. I write this blog. I Twitter.
Being in so many places on line, I find that I have difficulty managing my online presence. Recently, I discovered www.extendr.com, a very cool site that can help you with this. Joseph Rueter is the extendr.com founder. Here’s what he has to say about extendr and why he created it…
“Extendr started because I wanted a simple page to collect links to my stuff online so I could make easy and simple introductions of my online stuff to people with it. I didn't want the page to change but I wanted to be able to edit the page. In this way I could print the one location on cards and in my email signatures and on my social profiles. So I built a crude site under an odd name and stuck it out there.
“When friends started asking for their own pages I contacted a college friend to see if he'd be interested in applying his ninja developer skills to the service. Neil agreed and .extendr.com was born.
“Simply, extendr.com offers and easy way to put your links in one place. Hence our tag line – ‘Your links. One place.™’ We have all kinds of ideas about how to use the site and why it is a great idea but frankly the community is a better judge of value and we're getting very positive response.”
You can check out my extendr.com page at http://bb.extendr.com. Joseph’s extendr.com page is http://joseph.extendr.com .
The common sense principle here is simple. Successful people create positive personal impact. In order to create positive personal impact, you have to present yourself well -- in person and on line. As Michael Koenigs points out, it’s important to pay attention to what you post on line. Have fun, but don’t share your more outrageous exploits with the world. Think carefully about what you post on line. Also, a site like www.extendr.com can help you organize your on line presence. Check it out and create an extendr profile. It’s an easy way to share what you want about yourself on line and to manage your on line presence.
That’s my take on the opportunities and threats in todays on line world when it comes to creating positive personal impact. What do you think? Please leave a comment sharing your thoughts with us. As always, thanks for reading. I really appreciate you.
Bud
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