In anxious times, keep a leash on your fearful aggression
and embolden your fearful avoidance.
If you don't get a handle on your anxiety,
it will manhandle you.
Fearful aggression is what every show dog trainer needs to train out of their dog if they want to win "Best in Show." It occurs when fear causes dogs to growl and bark. On the other hand fearful avoidance causes dogs to cower which is not going to win them any ribbons either.
Dogs are not the only living creatures that exhibit fearful aggression. You see it in others, yourself and many people in the public eye who push too hard and come off as more desperate than strong.
I remember a business owner I worked with who was transformed into a tyrant as his fear of missing out on an opportunity caused him to bully two key employees to the point of leaving, and guaranteeing that his company would lose that opportunity.
Fortuitously, his company had another opportunity within a year. After I helped him "manage his anxiety" by channeling it into focus, preparation and determination, he managed to bring in and inspire people to replace the ones he had lost…and he was able to seize this one instead of letting it get away.
One of the best way to manage your anxiety is to follow these steps at the beginning of each day:
- Admit that you're anxious by saying to yourself, "I am anxious."
- Accept that you're anxious by saying to yourself, "It's not something else, I'm anxious."
- Just experience that you're anxious by saying to yourself, "I feel anxious."
- But DON'T act on it by saying to yourself, "Just breathe slowly and let it go."