Regretsy Showcases the Worst of Etsy

At its worst, Etsy is a gallery of handcrafted horrors.

What do a bejeweled calculator and a childbirth teaching model made of yarn (and complete with placenta) have in common? They're all put to public shame on Regretsy, a blog that spotlights the ugly, poorly proportioned, tasteless side of Etsy. Featured products come from emailed submissions and site creator April Winchell's searches. "It has to be something that is asking for it somehow -- it's really overpriced or just sick-to-death in love with itself, or really misguided," she says.

Her sharp eye paid off -- two weeks after she launched the site last fall, she was on her way to a book deal. Regretsy: Where DIY Meets WTF has the snark of regretsy.com, but Winchell generously gives the artists the last word. As for Etsy's last word, the site simply asked Winchell to stop using its colors. If only hideous handcrafts were so easily taken care of. Inspired by Regretsy, we trawled Etsy for its worst. We didn't know how bad it could be.

Phone, $175
The only way to make a mink phone handset classier is to attach it to a gem-adorned rotary base designed for "a seductive bedroom boudoir look with a [sic] Moroccan influences."

Lamp, $65
With its fake grass and its flashy yet realistic flutter of butterflies, this lamp narrowly misses the so-camp-it's-awesome aesthetic by using too little sparkle glue.

Crochet pattern, $4.50
If you're not careful when ordering, you might not end up with the "Little Miss Teapot Money or Coin Purse" that you wanted. Instead, like us, you end up with a crochet pattern to make one. So much better.

Hat, $20
The devil is so in the details here, from the yellow foam hearts to the Etsy description of this phallic felt hat, which is "Pepto Bismal [sic] Pink and Turquoise Blue."

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