Doth Not an iPad Bleed? Blend? Break Under a Baseball Bat?

BY Addy Dugdale | 04-05-2010 | 11:59 AM

Those of us living in Europe have had to be somewhat sanguine about the hysterical iPad coverage. It's not that we're not fans, but we don't get our hands on the thing until the end of this month. So when I see stuff like this I feel a little sick to my stomach.

Actually, no, allow me to go a little further. I hate this. Really hate this. Why are you smashing something up that people want? For starters, it's old, old stuff--when I worked for Gizmodo, we automatically banned any commenter who wrote "Yeah, but will it blend?" beneath a post. That Blendtec Tom may be a great guy, I'm sure he makes a mean silicon smoothie, but really.

And then there are these numb nuts. Why does this feel like the iPad symbolizes something greater than the sum of its shiny, well-designed parts? (Education, maybe?) Why do I suddenly feel myself transported to 1960s Alabama? I hesitate to even call myself a technophile, but this is nothing more than a hate crime. "Drop it! Hit it! Turn it over!" says one of the perpetrators. So, that's $500 down the toilet--and any chance of getting laid in the next decade absolutely shot to hell.